25. Crushes, Flirting and Dating...Are They Okay?

Crushes, Flirting and Dating…Is It Okay? Part 1

When it comes to having crushes, flirting and even dating, I think I have heard it all! These can be such confusing topics. 

Think about it, our parents tell us one set of rules, our friend’s parents have a different set of rules, our youth pastors may tell us yet a different thing…and I can tell you that this culture definitely has its own set of rules. 

For example, I have heard some adults saying that it’s a sin for teens to have crushes. On the other hand, I’ve heard parents who bragging on their teens and their crushes to others. I’ve heard parents tell their teens that they can’t date until they are 16…or even 30…haha! I’ve also seen kids who have had boyfriends or girlfriends in elementary school. And then we’ve got flirting. I honestly think that parents talk a lot about crushes and dating, but don’t talk to much to their kids about flirting. However, I did see a dad one time teaching his 5 year old son to batt his eyes and say, “I know” every time a lady called him cute. 

Can I be honest with you? I truly believe that the way our culture (and a lot of times even us Christians) treat crushes, flirting and dating is setting you up for failure. 

Now, I’m not saying that you should never have a crush and I’m also not saying that having a crush is a sin. I’m not saying that there isn’t a time and a place for flirting…we’ll get into all that in a moment. I’m not even saying that you can’t date or that you shouldn’t date. I’m not even going to tell you at what age you should start dating. In all honesty, that’s between you, your parents and God.

What I do want to share with you today are some principles that the Bible talks about when it comes to these topics…principles that my kids live by today. For those of you who don’t know, I have a 12 year old son, Javon, and a 14 year old daughter, Chara. 

This will be a two part series. This week we’ll talk specifically about crushes then next week, we will talk all about flirting and dating.

To learn more about what to do with crushes, check out today's episode of the UncommonTEEN Podcast.

Reach out to me on the UncommonTEEN App by clicking on the "Connect with Jamie" tab or by emailing me at uncommonteenministry@gmail.com.

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